List for Thursday

1. I’m making a list because I don’t want to put much thought into a real blog post.

2. I should be studying for my biology test right now. That’s next on my list.

3. I hate salads but had a good one with just lettuce, goat cheese, shredded chicken (that I made in the crock pot), and Asian sesame dressing. Maybe I’ll decide that I actually really like salads. Or maybe not.

4. I want to make dinner tonight. First time in forever if I do. I can’t believe that I’m about to say this, but I kind of miss cooking.

5. I got my mom’s car from work! I’m not trapped anymore! Now I just need to get my car fixed.

6. I don’t want to go to the gym AT ALL today. CrossFit is open again, but I don’t think I want to go. I’m considering going to LA FItness and working on squats today. Or skipping the gym entirely. I need to make it a priority again, but I’m seriously lacking motivation. And we’re running a 15k in March so I seriously need to get back to running. My schedule opens up in February (I work NO overtime, my paychecks will suffer) so I hope to be on a better schedule when it comes to the gym and running.

7. I put in an application with my first travel nurse company! I’m going to apply for my licenses next week to Utah and Massachusetts. I hope either state will be where my first assignment is. I have another company that I need to apply with. The girl who is traveling with me is supposed to be coming to visit in April for a weekend! I can’t wait to meet her in person and more importantly, I can’t wait to travel around the US!

8. Nashville wasn’t on last night because they were too busy fighting on the news about whose fault it was that Atlanta had a mass exodus on Tuesday. Get over it, guys. Stop arguing during Nashville! And now I can’t figure out how to watch it and am pretty sure I put a virus or something on my computer trying to watch it this morning.

9. I’m having serious travel fever. Serious serious. I didn’t leave the country at all in 2012 (that’s what happens when my travel friend has to go to too many out of state weddings) and after my trip to Croatia and Italy this past summer, the travel bug was reignited. I’m dying here, guys. Jon and I are doing a three week European trip in December for our honeymoon and I can’t wait that long. But I also can’t spend money going out of the country when we have a wedding and honeymoon coming up. I think I’m just going to have to plan our honeymoon and a trip for May of 2015 to Iceland (my dream vacation!) or Machu Picchu (Laura’s dream vacation). I was going to save for grad school but I just can’t do it. I need to see more of the world! 

10. Dove Caramel Chocolates are my weakness.

11. I also drink too much coffee these days.

12. I still haven’t cleaned all the glue off the wood floors. It’s been over a month. That’s how much I don’t want to do it. I should be doing that instead of writing in my blog but I’m not going to. I also need to clean the bathrooms. I read an article that the key to a happy marriage is hiring a maid. I wonder how much a maid costs. I’m kidding. Our house is 1131 square feet. I would feel totally useless as a human being if I hired a maid to clean our tiny house. But then again, I wouldn’t have to clean the toilets ever again or the pee that men manage to dribble all over in front of the toilet.

13. I think I’m finally going to get to see friends today! Once Jon gets home from work, he’s going to take me downtown to see Gina and Kassie. Although I have a car again, the roads downtown are questionable cause of the tall buildings blocking the sun. So he’s going to take me down there.

14. I must go study now.

 

Snowpocalypse Day 2

I’ve had quite the lazy morning! Instead of getting tons of schoolwork done last night and today like I had planned on, I spent the time watching Real World and Teen Mom. Can I just admit to my embarrassing love for Teen Mom and Real World? You know when your mind is so full of mush from having to concentrate on biology and you’re exhausted from taking care of patients for 12 hours and then you get home and want to kill your fiance for messing up your nice, clean house?! Me too. And when that happens and I’m overly stressed, I really just want to watch stupid drama on TV because it’s mindless. I don’t have to think about anything other than how stupid people can be. It’s wonderful. And Jon even watched Real World with me last night while we drank wine and cuddled under blankets. I asked him, “Aren’t you so glad I’m not crazy like these people?” and he said, “Yeah, but I’m concerned that you like watching these crazy people.”

I was wide awake at 8 this morning and considered getting up, but it was so warm in bed. I cuddled with Tom for an hour and then fell back to sleep until 10. I managed to drag myself out of bed and go for a 7 mile walk around in this snowy weather.

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It was really windy on just that specific street!

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Most of the bigger streets seemed okay, but the back streets were pretty icy. Along my walk, I met up with a middle aged woman who decided to turn around walk with me to try and see 285. I saw on the news that it was gridlocked, but people seemed to be moving fairly well. We talked about our condos and the weather and then she turned around and I continued my walk alone.

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This is actually the street that I live on, just south of 285 (I live about 1/2 mile up the road from here). The road was closed off from all other cars because it obviously turned into an icy, abandoned parking lot for cars. Most of them were unscathed, but a few had run into each other (there’s a little pile up in the front there). When I was walking down the hill, two cars decided to go around the road closed sign. One young woman decided to try and make it up and icy hill at a really low speed. All bad ideas. She slid down the hill, right into a perfectly good car that had parked on the side of the road. A passerby asked her, “Are you okay?” and she screamed, “NO I’M NOT OKAY!” Well, you probably shouldn’t try to take your little bitty car around the road closed signs and then try to drive up an icy hill. As I was walking by the on ramp for 285, cars were driving in the wrong direction to get back off the highway. Looking east on 285, I could see tons of trucks just parked on the highway. And then my walk ended back in my nice warm house! Thankfully I didn’t bust my ass on the ice, although I was close multiple times. It was just a sheet of ice under the snow for most of my walk

I had some breakfast after and watched some more Real World. Now I’m finally about to start on my homework. Jon is off work already (must be slow at the hospital!) but he’s running coworkers all over the place since he has a Jeep with four wheel drive. I’m hoping he comes home and keeps me company sometime soon! I get cabin fever really easily.

I may do a few arm exercises at home later on today. I’ve been doing them a little more than usual lately since I have to wear a wedding dress in four months and don’t want my arms to feel like little bony things protruding from my body. I’ve been really sporadic with eating lately and have been going to bed hungry out of sheer laziness, so I’m going to have to get my act together so I don’t lose weight.

Anyway, everybody have a wonderful day!

Snowpocalypse 2014

I just downloaded Google Chrome and can now see all blogs on my desktop! No more waiting for Jon’s computer to update myself on blogs! One day, I’ll have a laptop of my very own. I dream of it often. However, definitely not before the wedding. I’m hoping to invest in one when I leave for my first travel assignment in June!

Anyway, this has been yet another crazy few days. Sunday was spent moving Jon out of his storage unit and into our house completely. He had been keeping it because he thought there wasn’t enough room for everything here. There is. We just need to finish putting it all away.

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What a disaster!

I went to have dinner at Atlanta Bread Company with Laura and we went to pick up a picture that I had framed from Australia and some yarn for her. When I finally made it home at 7pm to go grocery shopping with Jon and start on homework, my car wouldn’t start! I have a 2011 Honda Civic! Granted, it has 67,000 miles on it, but still! Jon and I have deduced that it is probably the sensor on my starter, so either he will try to learn how to change it out or I’ll take it to the shop. Not positive yet. But we ended up having to drive out to my parent’s house to pick up my mom’s car so we can take mine to the shop this week (my dad also has a company car so they technically have an extra). We haven’t really discussed the plan on my car yet because…

It’s Snowpocalypse 2014! But really. Monday was spent working. Then doing homework. Today I worked 7-3p and it started snowing halfway through my shift. All of Jon’s classes were cancelled and since my mom wasn’t too keen on the idea of having me drive her car home in the snow/possible ice, I asked Jon to come pick me up. After a really slow day at work (apparently snowy days keeps the patients away), he managed to make it up to the hospital an hour after I got off work (it took him 2 hours to get there). I just talked to my dad and my mom has been driving home from work for EIGHT HOURS! She only works about 10 miles from home and she left at 1:30 this afternoon! It’s horrible here! She’s about 2 miles from home now but my dad said she’s not moving at all on the road!

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This isn’t where I work, but this was downtown Atlanta. Notice all the traffic.

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Top left is my condo with snow, bottom left is our parking lot with snow, and of course, the right is my handsome fiance with his snowball!

We didn’t hit much traffic heading back home, thankfully! I showered when I got home, took a quick nap, and then have been working on biology ever since! Any biology people out there, let me just tell you how much I dislike the Hardy-Weinberg equilibrium. Over an hour later, a phone call to my lab partner, and lots of erasing, I managed to finish 3 problems. I still have a ton of biology to catch up, unfortunately! Well, not even catch up on, but really to just remain with the pace of the class. I hate these hybrid classes!

Anyway, there has been a serious lack of gym time. I had good intentions of going Saturday but decided to have a date night with Jon instead (after I worked most of the day). Sunday we never actually made it to run the Hot Chocolate 5k because somebody assured me twice that we did not need to pick up our race packets before the race! Obviously, I didn’t verify this because I trust what people tell me. Somebody never checked the website. So, $110 out the window. Awesome. And yesterday was a work day and today was a snow day. I have a feeling the snow will be around tomorrow too, so I have no idea what will happen with the gym. I have paid for a CrossFit membership now so I’m ready to be going at least twice a week again but I guess the snow has other plans. I’m sure the city will be shut down tomorrow. Except for the hospitals, and Jon has to work so I’ll be home alone all day long 😦 Just kidding. I’m kind of excited to have a day at home alone.

Too bad we don’t have more food in the house. Also, I ate out way too much in the past week and also have been eating horribly. I ate four brownies yesterday. Wait, five. I had another after work. And then today, one of the doctors at work ordered us pizza (lucky delivery girl who sat in traffic for 1 1/2 hours to bring us our pizza at the hospital!) so I had two slices. I haven’t cooked in awhile because I have literally been working and doing schoolwork nonstop! I can’t wait to graduate in May!

Okay, off to start working on my biology! Everybody have a good week!

Typical week! Too much work and school!

Let’s not talk about how many times I’ve eaten out this week. Seriously. Except let’s. I don’t typically eat out for meals because it’s expensive and I just prefer my own food. However, I noticed a Fresh 2 Order right near the Whole Foods I go to and I love their Asian chicken and sweet potatoes. If you have an F2O, do yourself a favor and order this.

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 That was on Tuesday. But I did find my wedding dress on Tuesday and was able to finally have some time hanging out with Crista, so I was glad!

Wednesday Jon and I found our wedding venue! Lake Allatoona Inn. I don’t think I can even begin to put into words how happy we are to have found a venue! And even better, they had Memorial Day weekend available, so our wedding is set for May 24th! There are three bedrooms at the B&B, so Jon and I will have a room, his best man and his wife, and my maid of honor and her boyfriend. It’ll be so nice to have them there with us the whole weekend! We are beyond excited and I think both of us are breathing easier! Jon and I celebrated with a meal at Iberian Pig because we were in the area. I should have gotten pictures of my bacon wrapped dates and pork cheek tacos, but I didn’t. Delicious, however. I had been craving that! We topped our meal off with Cheesecake Factory cheesecake and I was a happy camper!

Thursday was work and class. As usual, my day consisted of nothing else other than a quick nap.

Today I was off again! I did homework this morning and made it to my first workout of the week! We did 30 pull ups, 30 ring dips, 21 clean and jerks, and a 2000m row. I finished in 21:07. Nate (the owner) tried to jump my 55# C&Js to 75# during the WOD, which after not lifting in so long, I could barely do. Which is sad because I used to do all my C&Js in WODS at 85#. But I’m just not feeling it. I love CrossFit. I love lifting heavy. But my heart isn’t where it used to be. We did muscle up progressions and I have done 3 muscle ups in my life. On my attempt to get the fourth, I felt like I almost ripped my shoulder off. After not working for three months because of a stupid injury (my thumb, not my shoulder), I refuse to put myself in a position where I feel like my body could be compromised. I can’t afford to be out of work for so long because I hurt myself working out. I want to push myself to my limits- not where other people think I should be. I felt exhausted after the WOD, which is rare for me. I was exhausted before it though, too.

Jon came home and we had some things to take care of. Then we went to Leon’s Full Service Garage for dinner. I had been wanting to try it.

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We decided to get somewhat fancy today. You can’t tell by my sweater, but I did have a dress on. It was just really cold.

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I had some zucchini fritter thing and a sandwich with a portobello mushroom, cashew and basil pesto, cheese, and tomatoes. It was really good! Then Jon and I came home and took naps.

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Way to take off your clothes and get in bed before our squishface.

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Anyway, my head had been hurting since after dinner and I woke up with a headache, so I took my Goody’s powder and did some homework tonight. Jon and I cleaned up the house a little bit and now I’m heading to bed! I have to work from 7-3 tomorrow and Sunday morning we’re running a 5k. I haven’t been running at all because life has gotten in the way lately (work, school, wedding planning!) so I’m sure I’ll want to die. I’m a little disappointed that my running ability has decreased, but at the same time, I just don’t have the time right now to do CrossFit and run and with my schedule this month, something had to take the backseat and I choose running. My schedule seems better next month, so maybe I’ll be able to get back to running more.

Off to bed!

ER nursing and “saving lives”

I had to work 8 hours today. No biggie. I had a patient that I have had in the past. I don’t actually remember much about her from the past other than her name. It’s hard to forget. After coming in for increased pain in  her legs due to her neuropathy (for one year), she asked me for a meal immediately and then asked me for pain meds. She rudely asked me for a blanket. Then she rudely stood in the hallway to remind me that I forgot her blankets (no, I did not forget, I was just busy with my other patients with legitimate complaints).

It can be really hard to enjoy being a nurse at times. Really hard. Really really hard. You get it? It can be completely thankless. Patients can be rude. They can be demoralizing. They expect you to bend over backwards when they come in for absolutely nothing and are rude to you the entire time. I have been yelled at, cussed at, told that they want any nurse but me (luckily, only my psych patients have told me that)… I had a psych patient tell me I was provoking her. I was barely saying anything. I’ve had patients refuse to leave but they don’t actually want my help.

But I had a patient a few weeks ago who had coded in the field. EMS brought him in with a heart rate in the 30s and a BP that was 60/palp (so he was in bad shape). We paced him on our monitor until the cardiologist was able to put in a temporary pacemaker. We had him on drips and fluids and were doing our best. He was awake, though confused and 100% concerned with when he would get water to drink, and he looked me straight in the eyes while I was trying to get a manual blood pressure on him and he said, “Thank you for saving my life.”

I’ve said how I feel about ever claiming that my job is “saving lives.” I’m a nurse, just like all other nurses. I’ve been a part of many lives saved, but it’s my job. That’s what I do. Just like the teller at the bank hands me my money or the server at a restaurant brings me my food. I’m just doing my job. And even though I feel like 99% of the time my job includes running through a shitstorm and not even coming out of it with anybody having any gratitude for what I just did, it was really nice to hear that man thank me for saving his life.

(By the way, in my eyes, the EMTs who arrived on scene actually saved his life. They brought him back. Myself, along with two other nurses, an ER physician, a nurse practitioner and doctor with the cardiology group, just kept him alive once he was already saved.).

Nursing is really a difficult job. I dislike it half the time and like it half the time. I never love it. I never hate it. But I’m often very grateful that I’m able to fill these shoes and walk into the ER, alive and healthy, and work my shift helping others. After three years of having patients tell me what a wonderful nurse I am or that I’m the best nurse that they’ve ever hard or that I have the heart for this profession (you know, between the patients who yell at me), I’m starting to believe it.

Wedding planning some more

I want to apologize for my lack of reading blogs! For some reason, my trusty old desktop hasn’t loaded any blogs in quite some time, but I happened to forget all about that in the last month of only using Jon’s laptop. Now that he takes his laptop to school and work, I can’t read blogs regularly. Also, ain’t nobody got time to be reading tons of blogs.

As I hit on in my frustrated post last night, I have been super busy. However, everybody cross your fingers and toes, I think a venue I’m going to see at 2pm today may work! Unfortunately, the woman had to move the time up in the day so Jon probably won’t be able to get out of work to go see it with me, but I’m ready to throw down some moolah if it looks good! It’s a B&B on a lake and it’s only 45 minutes away! We did really want a barn style wedding, but that’s just not happening for us! This place has a great outdoor area for us to have the ceremony and is only $1300 to rent the venue, which includes tables and chairs! By the way, at the end of this, I plan on doing a cost breakdown of everything. Anyway, $1300 is cheaper than most of the stuff that we’ve seen but does require a bartender. However, it’s also at a B&B. So hopefully the wedding party can book rooms at the B&B. We can drink Fireball and Jack all night by ourselves.

If this works today, I can buy the dress! The dress is $575 and I’m honestly hoping to get away with no alterations. David’s BRidal doesn’t carry 0s in the store unless they’re returns, so I was only able to try on one Vera Wang size 0 dress. The dress I want is made by Galina, which runs bigger. I tried the Vera Wang 0 on with a tank top and shirt on underneath and it was snug in the ribcage, but I didn’t have a real bra on (I had already gotten dressed again). If the real dress needs alterations, the price will go up. But in all honesty, if we can do that venue, it’s cheaper than we were expecting anyway so it saves us some money to put towards the dress. So, if I order it Friday, it can take up to 12 weeks to come in.

Bridesmaids dress shopping is happening this Wednesday! That’s another thing we have to get as soon as possible!

Anyway, aside from wedding talk, no workouts have been happening. I may make it to CrossFit later today, but I work tomorrow and need to clean, grocery shop, make food, do two assignments for school (should take 2-3 hours), and drive out to the lake to see this venue. Not a ton of time! I actually sat down now to work on biology but got distracted. It’s sunny out so I’d love to go hike Stone Mountain, but no time.

I really hope the day comes where I can focus just on my fitness. Obviously not just on that, but where so many things that have to get done don’t get in the way. I guess that’s what happens when you spend 10 years in school! I hope to be able to get back into CrossFit more when I’m doing travel nursing since I’ll be completely out of school by then!

 

Wedding woes

It’s been a busy last few days. I’m back in school and worked all 12s on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday so my nights were spent studying and being exhausted.

Jon and I had been planning on having a May wedding (very short notice), however, one of his groomsmen will be gone the first two weekends in May. That second weekend is when almost all of the venues are still available so it cuts out almost all of our option. Because of that, we basically have nowhere to get married. We have a list of probably 30 venues now that won’t work and a list of two that we are waiting to hear back from… I have two more to contact tomorrow.

There’s a venue I love (online, anyway) that isn’t super far and looks beautiful. However, it’s $1,000 more than we were originally wanting to spend on a venue. At this point though, I’m just so frustrated by the whole thing that I just want to spend that $1,000 so we can be done with this mess. We do have the money to put towards a wedding, I just feel very set on not spending a ton of money on one day! And the dress is already about $300 more than I wanted to spend!

This has been really stressful. I managed to find a dress I love today but it’s not suited for a winter wedding at all. It’s a summer wedding dress (because of the fabric). If we do a May wedding, I have to buy the dress by next week to make sure it can be altered if need be, but we don’t even know when we’ll be getting married.

We’ve been struggling with what type of wedding we want and what would work and what we should have (we both know what we want, it just doesn’t work with the other two in there). I really don’t want to elope at all but am honestly just so over all of this already. We have fought more over this wedding than anything else. I feel little bouts of depression come on because I’m realizing I’m not going to be able to get the type of wedding that I want unless we wait until spring or fall of 2015. We already will be married long before then, which we can hide and then I’ll just feel like I’m lying, or we can tell people and then I feel stupid for having a wedding after being married for so long.

I know planning a wedding is stressful, but I don’t feel any joy about this at all. I obviously want to marry Jon and want to celebrate with our friends and family and have a special day in a pretty dress, but if it has to take all this stress and arguing then I don’t really want it.

I don’t have anything else to say. However, if anybody else is trying to plan a wedding and running into the same things, at least you’re not alone!